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vintage bike of the day | old school velocette venom chopper

prometheus didn’t give us fire. he gave us money.

discovered this today. paul posted it and got a few interesting responses.

old school velocette venom chopper | before *** invented color!

i’m interested in what you spazwagons think. i post and post and write the craziest thoughts sometimes but only a handful comment regularly.

so here is the deal; if you leave a comment, i’ll be nice. i promise. pinky swear and hope to die forsaking jesus. which would suck, for those of you who don’t know that about me.

so (wo)man up. see the little comment link below the reactions? click it. be seen. write stuff. put your face and name behind your beliefs. these are times where the silent will be trampled over by the few bigmouth jerkoffs like ole and motoguru and (favorite politician to hate).

take that, paragraph diagram installer. i don’t color within the lines.


i know you’re looking at the cartoon beatle now but focus. the velocette venom chopper looks like a lot of what’s out there. it’s on death science, death machine, poopy buttwads, and chop cult. i don’t post much of it on bikerMetric because it isn’t my thing and since this is my home, my agenda is law.

i am willing to break the law. the law has itself become illegal so f**k it all. **** flows where it does and gold rises sometimes because you know the best place to urinate.

and the award for most metaphorical once-sentence parentheses writer goes to….

trent reker!

(crickets chirping)

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  1. Haha, bigmouth jerkoff! Love it.

    As for the bike, what’s not to love about a period thumper! Wanna know my favorite part about it? It’s not a knuck or a pan.

  2. Wouldn’t wear the lowtops with this one. looks like some kind of flamingo with that neck, one thing I do like is the battery placement.

  3. **** yea, mg. it’s like you just bought me a beer.

    the world needs more bigmouth jerkoffs. i work hard at it in hopes that the one thing the united states still exports, entertainment, lands me a job as propaganda minister/senator’s speechwriter, or dead in an explosion so dynamic everybody within a thousand miles will cry for the pepper spray in stuck in their eyes.

  4. i hear you, sam. i like lower and longer, myself. the frame molding i could do without. i’d think she handled well and was a great urban bopster.

    remember, whoever rode this thing might have been wearing bell-bottom jeans. sometimes appreciating an old custom chop or bob is admitting that it took nuts to wear bell bottoms, ’cause man, them pants was ugly.

    but i like this bike. the thing i wonder most about is the banner painted on the tank. it’s blank. should it not have said “stick it to the man,” or “grass, gas and ***?”

  5. I think a Velocette done up in any style other than a proper cafe bike is sacrilege. Being a sacrilegious sort, I like it anyway.

  6. Not something I want, but it pushes some boundaries, may make some folks uncomfortable, and as long as it is actually ridden, I’m cool with it. If you aren’t falling off the edge sometimes, you’re not close enough.

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