friday’s post of cool stuff #39 (saturday edition): gimme an are! gimme an ee!

First off, let me remind everybody:

Ever heard of Robbie the Brit bob master? He’s renowned for creating killer choppers up the right side of the English coast, East of Newcastle. His blog is filled with great stuff, most is what he creates. I love the guys that work on anything. His Sporty Ironhead chop looks like I drew inspiration from it for the ForD. His matte black CB750 chop looks nice.

black matte cb750 chopper

Especially with a turquoise and pink background but that’s only because Oprah read his self-help book. It had something to do with vaginas and religious cults. Anyway…. you bastards don’t understand my humor and geez, I can’t focus on one thing any more. Facebook, Twatter, impending economic superoverinflation emails and the inevitable collapse of America!  AAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!

Buy a gun before one is pointed at you.

Stupid MTV. Ruined me by the time I was 18. Here is the f***ing point, Robbie’s NSU Prinz chopper:

robbie’s nsu prinz chopper

According to Robbie, whose webworld nick is allegedly short for his surname, Robinson, he will be riding the machine next year. This pretty much gives him a year to build the bike, but my bet is we see video of him riding it by June. Robbie is planning on turbocharging it, too. Scary and cool. The gearbox is a BSA plunger with a Norton clutch. He’s got a duplex BSA engine sprocket and chain and clutch sprocket that he’ll adapt to the Norton clutch. That’s rad *** motherf***ing engineering s**t.

I know. I wasn’t going to curse so much and drink less beer but it’s been made clear that revolutionaries don’t obey rules, and the dead are always the most fat of mind, spirit and body. Plus, I’ve already correlated revolution to beer and I find when I’m sober I’m more likely to say “eh, whatever” than to throw s**t around like a rabid monkey.

Nice monkeys get their heads exploded in outer space. Rabid s**t-throwing monkeys make you take a shower and contemplate.

1960 nsu inline three prinz auto

The NSU Prinz was an air-cooled inline three motor from a company with a great history of motorcycle innovation. In 1901 the first NSU motorcycle rolled out of a sewing machine factory turned bicycle factory turned motorcycle factory…

1901 first nsu | 234cc – 1.75 horsepower – 31 mph/48 kmph

If only that kind of foresight and intellectual labor could be found today.

nsu single tech diagram

The motor went in the car in “the boot,” as they say on Top Gear.

So many German autos had air cooled motors in the ***. Volkswagen being the obvious representation. Good for brisk German weather. Not so good for punks in the American Southwest. It’ll be great in a badass motorbike.

If you are an American, don’t be a dumbass. Listen to Senator Bernie Sanders:

If you are a citizen of the USA, please play and listen to and contemplate the entirety of the words spoken above. If you will not, f**k off and don’t come back. I’m not here to be the b**ch for those who buy the truth. I’m here to hold your head over the stench of bought-for truth.

The truth I understand is an 80 degree day in Austin where I sit on the back porch drinking and smoking happy that global warming brought my energy bill down last month.

Support those who tell the truth. Support Mox News.

Vote For Independence.

“*** forbid we should ever be twenty years without such a rebellion. The people cannot be all, and always, well informed. The part which is wrong will be discontented, in proportion to the importance of the facts they misconceive. If they remain quiet under such misconceptions, it is lethargy, the forerunner of death to the public liberty.” – Thomas Motherf**king Jefferson

What does this have to do with motorbikes?

Liberty. But we’ll start with how taxes take liberty from you.

Oil companies get tax breaks for destroying things to suck up a few precious bits of addiction. Gas guzzling cars get taxed and basically the government taxes the cars that use the most fuel and gives it back to the companies that produce the fuel by assisting them in, oh, cleaning up their f***ing messes. 20 billion from bp to assist in the cleanup and subsidize ruined industries is the taxes Americans pay for them to ruin the Earth.

bp promises money that will never be exhausted upon those asking for it. Watch.

It is time for a revolution and the first thing is that motorbikes ought to be tax exempt. Any bike that gets 40mph or more, no tax upon purchase and free parking spots.

No more tax breaks for oil companies. We do our thing, you do yours. Ours doesn’t require destroying entire ecosystems to save money. Our thing isn’t about getting money to make money. It is about working. The money we earn is by the ever-sour-tasting fruits of our increasingly underappreciated labor.

When our society collapses like ashes of burnt American dollar bills from a banker’s hands, who will be able to build stuff and what need for bankers will we have?

End them now and save yourself the trouble later.

I am so on the homeland insecurity list. F**k you, police state! I fart in your general direction!

I’m sorry. This is why I shouldn’t be President. I meant to write abolish the IRS. It’s an unconstitutional entity.

I find it ironic that Christ trashed the temple because people were trading money, but our nation is truthfully a Judeo-Christian country, that “In *** We Trust” is printed upon the one dollar bill, while that money, trusting in ***, feeds corporations that use that same money against those that work and live to survive sharing only a treasury, not a faith. Not a work ethic. Not a commonality of hard hands and pink flesh.

Yes, that’s the entire movie. The *** Pistols were fools to pretend that Floyd didn’t have more social significance than everything Johnny Rotten has splushed out with a copyrighted sneer since 1975.

When I’m king of the world I’m gonna hurt everybody but Roger Waters and Neil Young… and you. of course.

(ahem)

The most troubling thing is that I write these incendiary statements and if lucky, one or two of you will comment. Well, f**k. Are you lackey b**ches marching in line or do you have something to say? Find the COMMENT link below and make your voice heard.

“With your tears flowing out behind you as you claw the thin ice…”

I wish I didn’t see it this way. I wish the American dream was true and real and attainable by the common working man. But the “Patriot Act” negates habeas corpus and corporations are not the people. They are instead our masters.

Come on, people. Isn’t it obvious? Isn’t it time to realize that Bush f**ked you and Obama is, too? Stop pointing fingers and extend your hand in humanhood. Brothers and sisters.

Want to know the impact of unregulated immigration? Ask a Native American.

Many Native American leaders read, spoke and understood English. They read the Bill of Rights and the United States Constitution. If you die defending your rights, you die heroically. Dissent is patriotic.

I’ll die. I hope not praying to *** for forgiveness, but gouging out the eyes of my killer, cutting out his tongue, that my life and death might assist in saving the world.

Get the best of bikerMetric directly in your inbox, once a week, every week.